I’ve been back in London for twelve days and my holiday buzz has officially worn off. Possibly it has something to do with the fact that I’ve been getting up every morning and heading to work while my husband and houseguest slumber on, but it might also be because, frankly, the tube just hasn’t gotten any better this year.
I mean, I wasn’t exactly expecting it to suddenly become efficient or spacious or less full of dickheads… but when you haven’t been on the tube for a while you suddenly forget just how soul-destroying commuting is.
I don’t think this is exclusively a public transport phenomenon, while in car-crazy South Africa I heard enough of my friends exclaim with glee how empty the roads are in December in Johannesburg and I’ve seen enough wall posts on facebook cursing the traffic and the broken “robots” as I’ve seen “I hate the tube!”
I guess the best way to cope with the creeping rage as someone rests their bag, face… self… on you or shoves you out of the way to nab the last seat or demands that you move down when the only available space is clearly the luggage rack (same goes for when someone cuts you off, stops randomly or runs a red light) is to remember that that they’re all just trying to get to work and that they’re just has harassed and exhausted as you are.
That would probably be the most karma-friendly approach. Unfortunately I’ve never mastered this approach. I prefer to fantasise about how I might murder everyone who has crossed me on my daily journey (read epic battle of doom) to and from work. I also like to intersperse this with occasional thrown elbows, dirty looks and well-timed toe trampling.
I am relatively sure that the amount of negative energy I have transmitted into the universe in the last twelve days has probably put me into negative karma for the rest of the year, however I just can’t stop imagining burning the luggage of every tourist who crosses my path… and if I’m honest… it feels pretty good.
So before I end up becoming the next Kazran Sardick, does anyone have any good rage busting tips… apart from actually pea-shooting people with prams?
It could be worse...
