Where does one buy breast insurance?

Finally five minutes to write. Friday night B and I went to check out some stand-up comedy in Camden. The less said about that the better. What I can tell you is that a short course in stand-up may teach you some comedy techniques but funny is like every other form of creativity… you either can or you can’t. You can teach someone to spell but not how to write…. you can teach someone to play a music instrument but not how to compose… and you can teach a slightly unstable loser how to tell jokes but comedic timing is inborn. Also I now know more about the Argos in Catford than I ever thought necessary.

Saturday had me up early and on a mission. After the fairy cake incident of last Sunday, I have been bitten by the baking bug. This time it was a white chocolate and raspberry cheesecake… recipe nabbed from The Metro… some ingredients not available at the local Sainsbury’s so I had to go to Southside. It was there I met the blender of destiny. Our hand blender gave up the ghost not too long ago so I’ve been thinking of getting a new one. Found a Philips one on sale for half-price. It has a food processor attachment and a fairy cake attachment (whisk). I am in love. Arrived home even prouder than if I had bought a pair of shoes. Abbi = housewife. So far I have fed said cheesecake to B, Yvonne and Nick. The Consensus is that it’s good… just in case you’re feeling bakey… this is the recipe.

Ingredients

100g crushed digestive biscuits
100g crushed ginger biscuits
100g butter
250g mascarpone cheese
250g cream cheese
70g icing sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
500g melted white chocolate
300g raspberries

Mix crushed biscuits with butter and press into the bottom of ideally a pie plate (or if, like us, you don’t have a pie plate, some other kind of dish). Stir together cheese, icing sugar and vanilla. Gently fold in chocolate (make sure you allow it to cool before you add it). Pour over biscuit base. Cover cheese mixture with a layer of raspberries. If you push the raspberries slightly into the cheese mixture, their juice won’t run out over your beautiful white cake. Refrigerate overnight.

After the baking was done, I tempered my impending housewifery by drinking beer and watching rugby. Thank goodness South Africa won after getting cocky and taking off half the top players at half time…

Our evening was spent in Richmond celebrating Alex’s birthday. It was lovely to see everyone but I have to say that Richmond is a strange place. Charming during the day but oddly sinister at night. I had a number off odd encounters during the night. First I had a very drunk man come and insist that I tell his even drunker friends what the tattoo on my leg says. Impressively posh and middle-aged, they went on to chant about me getting onto their table, while looking down my dress. Fortunately Ryan saved me and they went on to pole dancing around the garden umbrellas… sigh.

When we left another “gentleman” shouted, “nice ginger wig” at me. I shouted back, “It’s my real hair!” And he replied, “Show us your pubes and I’ll believe you.” Yup… classy. When Barb and I finally went home, we were accosted by pykies. One of whom asked me if I was insured. When I expressed my confusion, he said, “to carry those boobs!” Starting to think I feel safer in Brixton than in Richmond!